Have you ever wondered why some teams thrive under pressure?
A key element comes down to emotional intelligence (EI).
Hey, it’s Chris. This week, let’s talk about how to lead with emotional intelligence.
Many people incorrectly equate emotional intelligence as being nice to others. Some even have an ick factor, as they incorrectly assume emotions have no place in business.
There’s a lot more to emotional intelligence, though.
Over the years, I have worked with leaders possessing strong EI skills. And I have worked with managers who sorely lacked the skill. In every case, the teams in the former category outperformed teams in the latter category.
They tended to be more innovative, creative, and resilient through challenges. They supported one another, stepping up to meet the unknown unknowns.
EI starts with four pillars that every leader should master.
The Four Pillars of Emotional Intelligence
1: Self-Awareness
If you don’t know your emotions, you don’t understand how they influence your actions. As a result, you don’t recognize their impact on others.
2: Self-Management
When you are in tune with your emotions, here’s the next step: Managing them. It’s important to stay cool under pressure and prevent emotions from hijacking your day.
3: Social Awareness
Tune into other’s emotions, understanding more deeply as you pick up on cues. Here’s why: Empathy creates cultures of trust, safety, and collaboration. You are able to take better actions when you consider the team.
4: Relationship Management
Influence, coach, resolve conflicts: Managing relationships requires using your emotions insight to guide your team forward towards success.
Easy Actions to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence
Start with Mindfulness
A few minutes of mindfulness in the morning sets the tone for the day. Notice your thoughts and feelings. Are you anxious about the day ahead? Do you have enough emotional energy to handle surprises?
A few minutes at the end of the day further helps you assess how you handled specific stressors and situations. The insight allows you to become more aware and take proactive steps going forward.
Ask for Honest Feedback
Don’t guess, but instead ask your team for open, honest, and actionable input. For example, ask: “Do you feel that I support your work effectively?” and “Do you feel like I’m approachable when issues arise?”
Of course, the team will likely be quite surprised at the start, especially if you haven’t ever sought this sort of insight. But with this information, you become aware of any blind spots.
Listen to Understand
The power of active listening should never be underestimated. Ask questions and listen to understand, and that includes the other’s emotions. In doing so, you gain the right information to take the right actions.
Pro point!: Ask: “If you resigned today, what would your reasons be?”
The answer each person gives will provide you with insight into their personal values, individual needs, what keeps them up at night, and what changes you need to make.
Tame Stress
You need to know your triggers in order to proactively avoid stress. For example, if you feel overwhelmed with interruptions, you might block time on your calendar for deep work. Or you might schedule check-ins earlier in the morning if you are more productive later in the day.
However, you should also have a strategy when stress strikes. You might talk a short walk or grab a coffee, for example.
Handle Conflicts with Care
Approach conflicts with a clear mind. If you are emotional, then you will not be empathetic. Practice supportive communication, and aim for resolutions which respect each person’s perspective and strengthen their sense of unity.
Wrapping Up
You can lead with emotional intelligence through continued practice. People quit poor managers, so be intentional and focus on these points, purposefully leading with greater empathy to become a better leader.
I’ll close with two questions for you: When it comes to EI, how well do you measure up? And more importantly, where can you improve?
Until next week, keep mastering the craft of leadership!